What me? I am never bitchy.

One of the things that seems to be a challenge is the notion of the Dominant Wife expressing displeasure with her sub husband. I know my wife thinks that if I screw up or show her improper respect, she is not going to go overboard and make a big deal about it, after all, "she is not my mother and I am a grown man," she has said.

Of course I know that she is not my mother, I do not want her to be my mother. However, I do want her to expect and require my respect and sometimes that requires her input. Last week, for some reason, probably because I felt she was not engaged enough, I sunk into a "non-submissive, I only care about me" funk. For about two days I was surly, was not proactive in meeting her needs, was just being a bitch really. I remember one evening she was working on computer and I went in and made myself dinner and went and sat down to watch tv and eat. She asked me if I made her any or left her some and I said, "nope, all gone." This type of behavior went on for a couple of days. I wasn't testing her to see if I could get a response. Though in some stupid way I wanted to see how she would react to "the old me." I have asked for a weekly discipline session so maybe she will enact that and it will be dealt with then. But we haven't gotten to that weekly thing yet. So in my mind I wasn't testing but I was observing her response. I know, probably not really a distinction, but in my warped noodle it was.

Secretly I did wish she would have a belly full and take me to the woodshed and let me have it with the paddle. But not only is she hesitant with the paddle nowadays, she also didn't do anything. To me she just let it run its course and I was back on track a couple of days later because I just can't go too long without submitting to her, she has my number and I am so smitten with her I can't stay too long away from her umbrella of covering.

We talked about it later. She said she did tell me she was displeased but I said to her, I don't remember at all. She sometimes thinks that a comment with no urgency or steam given by her equals a greater intensity when I hear it. It doesn't. If she says she expressed her displeasure with me I am not doubting it, I just never heard it, it was never conveyed to me in a way I remember.

Which brings me to a post by another blogger titled "Bitch Mistress." I think it shows how the submissive mind works to a certain degree. As submissives, we do need a "Bitch Mistress" to deal with us when we are "Bitchy Submissives." Sometimes we are so deep in our funk, we need a loud definitive reminder, so loud it shakes us.

One of the things I would tell any women in a 'fem/dom' relationship is sometimes you need to be the bitch mistress. There are times when a man needs a boss lady that can verbally or physically put him in his place. It is good for him. One of John's responsibilities is the care and maintenance of my closet. That includes picking up my clothes, washing, and ironing, and making sure that my shoes are clean and polished. Having John take care of my clothing is one of the little luxuries I have come to enjoy. However, when I pick up a pair of shoes, I expect them to be clean. Picking up a pair of dusty shoes would not make me happy. John would hear about it in a negative way. The truth is that men need to know you are watching them, and you expect a certain level of service AND RESPECT. From what I have seen that type of strong feedback is important to the submissive man. It may be humiliating for him, but it is not cruel. It is what he needs.

I added the respect thing in her quote because I believe a submissive man should also always speak and act with respect to his Mistress and when he doesnt she should correct him. I like asking her "May I.." when asking for somethings. To me it is honorable and respectful and I want my submission to be worthy. There is another quote below from a Lady on the link list that sees it the same way.

First and foremost is the use of the question "May I……" I can be in a room of 50 people and my ears will bring my attention right to the man who utters these words. These are the two words in the English language that speak more to a Dominate woman than any other. May I get you a chair, May I get you a drink, May I get your jacket…and so on. There is no better way to show the female of your dreams respect then to use these words..
As simple as they may sound the words "May I…" carry a deep history for all of us. We were taught at a very early age to respect our elders and use these very words. I can remember as a little girl asking my grandmother for a piece of candy and being corrected more than once that it's not "Can I have a piece of candy" because I can have or do anything. It was "May I have a piece of candy" as this showed respect to those I was speaking to.
It is everywhere in our society but to me it never carries more meaning then when it comes from a lips of a male submissive. It is the ultimate in respect, reverence and concern. It is the way they half smile and bow their head knowing that unlike most, they are not just asking a question, but taking it upon themselves to realize their place. It pulls at my Dominate soul, it is the verbal equivalent of sitting at my feet in worship.

I am old school I guess. Love the protocol language.

Enough banter from me. I encourage comments from all as my wife does read this blog as well as has her own listed to the right.