Well..... she was tired again last night, may have a little bug that is running her down. She wanted to sleep on couch while I watched some basketball but I convinced her to go to bed. I went with her, did a little hair brush, spent a few minutes just rubbing her back and top of legs, put a little soft music on and covered her up. She slept like a rock.

This morning, she called while I was cleaning up the kitchen. She could hear the clanging of dishes and asked me two questions that confused me. "Do you like doing the housework because you like doing it or do you do if for me? Sometimes I feel like I am lazy because I don't have to do anything at home." I answered, "well, both sort of. I don't mind doing the housework and since you are busier than me now, it seems logical. When things ramp back up on my end, I will probably still want to do it. And two, yes I like doing it for you." I tried to explain further and she cut me off. Sometimes she thinks I use every opportunity to drive home the Female Led mantra to her. I really don't think I do and I even asked her if I was putting too much pressure on her and she said no I was not. However, it is my nature to blast away on a concept to her and she gets overwhelmed, again, don't think it is happening here, but I always need to be aware. But, there is some hidden agenda to those two questions that I don't think I will get without another female perspective chiming in to educate me. So, if any of you ladies have a guess, feel free to ponder.

One more thing we discussed. I have told her that my masturbation days are over, that she is "in control" of my orgasms. Now, if it was earlier in our marriage, when I did self serve quite frequently, , she really didn't like it,... put up with it,.... kind of pretended I didn't do it,.... would have preferred that I didn't do it. Now I am not doing it, she does not like the fact that I say "she controls" my orgasm. I told her that I thought it was a pretty special gift for me to give her and that it is made better by her acknowledging it verbally with me. But, somehow, that is a tough one for her. Again, I am convinced it is rooted in some realm of womanhood that I am not privy too. I would love to know the answer, but again, as a dude, I don't see what the issue is. As I mentioned to her, a lot of the joy I get as being her submissive is how things are framed, the overall guiding perspective of the actions I do for her and her response to them, as well as the things she does for me. So, somehow, the perspective of why I do the dishes and the limits on my self pleasure is not quite in its proper place for her yet.

I enter quicksand easily. On one hand I am always trying to anticipate her wishes and acting on them, on the other hand, when I try to use my intuitive knowledge, I hit the roadblock of trying to figure out what goes on in a womans head. She doesn't understand why I as a male, like things framed a certain way and I don't understand why as a female, she likes things framed a certain way.......................Arrrrghh, I'm getting my headache again.!!!!!!!!!!

But, it is all good. She knows that I am sincerely trying, it is rooted in me trying to put her wishes ahead of mine. Because of the sincerity of my actions, she is willing to try on her end. So, net result, we are having fun on this journey together!